Behind the Mic: What You Don’t Hear

Podcasting sounds easy until you’re the one behind the mic — sitting in the stillness before you hit record, wondering what version of yourself will show up today.

I don’t really “plan” these far ahead.

Sure, I have a few ideas floating around — notes scribbled in my phone, fragments of thoughts I might circle back to someday. But most of what you hear comes straight from the mood I’m in right now.

That’s the thing about Her Mood — it’s never scripted. It’s felt.

A few episodes were mapped out in advance, but those were usually the ones that scared me the most. The ones I hesitated to even record. The ones I asked myself, “Should I really say that out loud?”

Because the truth is — when you share your life, even with good intentions, you think about who’s listening.

The people who know you. The ones who love you.

And somewhere in the back of your mind, you wonder: Will this hurt them? Offend them? Change how they see me?

At least for me, that question is always there.

There’s a weight to telling the truth — not because honesty is hard, but because it has consequences.

But the longer I do this, the more I realize that my silence does too.

So I’m learning to let go of the guilt, the overthinking, the imagined reactions — and remember something that took me years to believe:

I matter, too.

My perspective, my story, my voice — they’re not apologies waiting to happen.

They’re the pieces of me I’ve spent too long editing down to make room for everyone else.

What you hear in each episode is maybe 20 minutes of clarity. What you don’t hear are the pauses, the deep breaths, the backspace moments — the ones where I almost talk myself out of it.

But that’s the point, isn’t it?

Her Mood was never supposed to sound perfect. It was supposed to sound human.

So if you’ve ever listened and thought, “She sounds like she’s figuring it out as she goes” — you’re right.

Because I am.